There Is No Other

They say today, 14 Feb is a valentine day, a lover's day to express love, is there someone to love? Who am I? When you are the witness, at the soul level, beyond the ego and personality, there is no other. The soul drops away the ego and its story. 

When you are somebody, acts as a separate self then you identify with your story.  It only happens when you are at the ego level of ‘I’ and its story. I am this and that. At this level, your love is a possessive type of love; this ‘body’ loves that ‘body’, therefore it is individualistic and unique love, personal and special love for specific persons. Love with conditions, of course. This kind of love, you still don't know who you really are. Another kind of love, is conscious love, you know who you are. You have found the home of love, that's yourself. So you don't need other to love you, because you are. 

When you are the soul, the witness--a flow of love occurs, not active loving in nature but natural present of flow. You are nobody although the storyline is still going on as usual but no owner to create a drama between you and me. Just being and with no other. Because you are no longer identifying with it. There is tremendous release on your life! You are no longer binding to the conventional love, which needs somebody to love, and beloved. You no longer need bodily and possessive love; personal of love and hate relationship--always to be reminded to love and to be loved constantly--because there is simply no one to love. It is empty but there is the individual storyline, floating out there. You see it without identifying with it. How can you fall in love or get involved with the characters of a movie script? Because you know it is just a script with the characters playing and moving on a screen, it is not real. That insight of realisation, that understanding extricates you out of the world of duality--the world of love and hate, of personal, possessive and selfish relationship. What a relief!

When there is no other, the life is simple and easygoing, you save yourself for involving with the complicated and messy relationship. As long as you take somebody as the object of love, this personal involvement with possessive love, indicates you identified with the ego level of separate self, where all the world of emotions and feelings are pressing on you and become a burden to your life. You are trapped and not free when intertwined with this kind of love. Your world is limited and narrowed. That's the ego level of love, all the time  you need to sustain this separate self. You are afraid to lose the love, you cling to it tightly. There will be the end of the world when you lost it! It is terribly tiresome to sustain it. But people are so used to live this kind of life--a life of ups and downs, love and hate, pleasure and pain. Although, it is a burdensome and oppressive life, on ego perspective, it is perfectly aright.

What life style do you want to live? It is like choosing a radio channel, you can switch to another channel--the soul channel, one level up from ego--the witness. Your world change, so your love perspective. And you are ready to open up your heart. Then, there is unconditional and conscious love in the air that previously you have not detected or noticed. It pervades and spreads in every part of the universe, every moment you are in love--with tree, plant, dog, cat, even rock and walls of your house ...  Every moment, everywhere, you are expressing your love to everything. You simply feel indebted to the whole universe for no reason. That's love! So everyday is valentine day. Your soulful love is expressing itself because its nature is love. "The love is in the air" -- This is the real meaning deserved for it.  In the soul level,  there is no other, no lover but only the universal love of soul is ever-present, and it is always and already here, why look outside? So no need to look for lover, you are love. Doesn't it Beautiful? 

Still, wishing those who are engaging in conditional love of ego--a happy valentine day! And hope one day you may be able to upgrade yourself, switch to soul level and know who you really are. At the time being, enjoy while you can.

He did it his way

A heart warming, thought provoking and inspiring true story.

By Ng Zhu Hann, Star-2 online

A young man who placed family first showed that nothing is impossible when your heart is in it.

MY best friend Terrence Phang Ying Choy was from SMK Bandar Utama, Selangor. I had known him for 12 years, since primary school. I literally grew up with him and he was like a brother to me.

Ying Choy came from a poor background. His father is a contractor and his mother, a housewife. He had two younger siblings and they live in a rented apartment.

Like most Chinese-educated students, his command of English was comparatively weaker than that of his peers. He was also an ordinary student with no special talent in sports or music.

However, Ying Choy worked twice as hard as his peers and did really well in school. He scored 6As and 1B in his UPSR, 8As in his PMR and 9A1s and 2As in his SPM.

Despite his good results he failed to secure any scholarship after Form Five. Because his father’s construction jobs are seasonal, he decided to work to supplement the family’s income and support his younger brothers, instead of furthering his studies. He did sales and marketing for his uncle’s firm, worked on a construction site and gave tuition four times a week for one full year. In fact, he was the sole breadwinner during the economic downturn in 2007.

When his father’s income became more stable as the property market picked up again, Ying Choy decided to go back to his studies. He felt manual labour was not enough to help the family.

He enrolled in Form Six, studied for about three months, then dropped out. He switched to A-levels at Tunku Abdul Rahman (TAR) College, where he got a full subsidy for his course. But he dropped out after two months.

Finally, he enrolled in Universiti Tunku Abdul Rahman for a foundation programme, which he completed. Once again, he stopped studying and went back to work for some months.

Ying Choy dropped out three times because he could not focus on his studies knowing that his siblings would be leaving school soon and needed money to further their education.

One day, he saw some Facebook pictures of his secondary school friends who were studying in London, on tour in the Swiss Alps. He wondered why others could do it while he could not. He realised it wasn’t because they were smarter but that they had better opportunities.

So he withdrew the RM17,000 he had saved from working and took a leap of faith – he signed up for an express A-levels programme that Sunway College had just introduced.

The gamble was that if he did well, he would get an offer from a good university, which would enable him to get a scholarship. He could then use the money to study and save some for his family.

After being away from books for almost one-and-a-half years, Ying Choy had to struggle to cope. Every day he attended college from 8am to 6pm; went home for dinner; gave tuition from 8 to 10pm, and then revised his lessons from 10.30pm to 12.30am. He did this for a whole year.

Early 2009, Ying Choy received offers from five top British universities: the London School of Economics, Imperial College London, Warwick University, University College London and University of Cambridge. He also got offers from Melbourne University and the National University of Singapore.

He was shocked and elated. He least expected to get a place in Cambridge, which many top Malaysian students had failed to get into, what more a boy whose pre-U studies was never exceptional.

Despite the good news, he still had to get the scholarship.

After being rejected by various companies and foundations, he finally received an offer from Sime Darby, one month before Cambridge’s acceptance deadline. Ying Choy had defied the odds to attain a place in the one of the best universities in the world.

That year, he stepped on an aeroplane for the first time in his life. It was his first trip abroad and the first time he had left home. He was the first in his family to go for tertiary education.

He promised them he would come back and life would be good after he graduated. He would take them to Europe and buy a new house so they need not have to rent.

Ying Choy spent wisely and saved substantially. Every month, he sent home a large portion of his allowance.

He did remarkably in his first year at Cambridge, scoring first class honours and was ranked 37 among the 160 engineering students in his batch. He did equally well in his second year.

In July, Ying Choy came home for the summer holidays. His family had been looking forward to his return and everyone had a good time with him back.

But life took a cruel twist on Sept 1. At 6am that morning, he had breathing difficulties and collapsed by the side of his bed.

My best friend died about six hours after I last saw him. He had looked perfectly healthy then. In fact, he was a basketball player and a gym rat.

He was buried on Sept 4. He was only 22.

A large portion of his savings – he had saved over RM50,000 for his siblings’ education – was used for the funeral expenses. His family, who are still in shock, now have to worry about their younger sons’ education even as they grieve for their eldest boy.

Ying Choy strongly believed in self-help. He was vehemently against using connections as the way to success. He was living proof that meritocracy still exists today.

I will always miss him.

克服困難的喜悅

人生最大的樂趣，莫甚於超越困難，一步步接近成功；以及立下新的願望，眼看這些願望，一個一個實現。

凡是從事於偉大而有價值的事業的人們，他們雖然辛勞，但一開始就懷著希望在支持他們，到最後，實現願望的那份喜樂足以抵償一切辛苦。

不輕易放棄，不被困難，挫折而表現悲觀或失望，而是勇敢去面對克服每一個難題，用耐心，樂觀，努力，終於征服一切，這是人類最大的喜悅。

.... Samuel Johnson

放下它

Just to Share My Thoughts....

Warren Buffett

Without fancy house, Warren Buffett lives in

this modest house for decades.

Wow... He throws away his money!

1. Money doesn't create man but it is the man who created money.
2. Live your life as simple as possible.
3. Don't do what others say, just listen to them, but do what you feel good.
4. Don't go on brand name; just wear those things in which you feel comfortable.
5. Don't waste your money on unnecessary things; just spend on them who really in need rather.
6. After all it's your life then why give chance to others to rule your life.

The advice given by Warren Buffett, the second richest man in the world after Bill Gates. Same as Bill Gates, this man gives almost all his wealth back to the society. Rich man like Warren Buffett lives a simple life and keep low profile.

Well, people like him so rich and yet so modest, and live in such a simple life. Seldom people realize and differentiate between need and want, between sensual pleasure and inner happiness. To live a simple life it means Warren Buffett lives on his need rather than want, that is the main reason why he can lead such a simple life because he enjoys inner happiness. Simple life & happiness related to one another and intertwined.

You see, say is easy, people like us, often succumb to 'want' more than 'need'! I always think I lead a very simple life, now I think it may not be so, hehehe...

Over many years, one of my weaknesses is, I spend quite a hefty sum on IT products, like computers & hand phones, etc. I always want to keep up with the latest model or the most advanced products. A very expensive 'hobby'! And a classic example of showing greed and buying things more than necessary or need! This is NOT a simple life anymore, right?

Malu or shame to say that actually I am planning to buy iPhone4, iPad, etc .... hahaha... Why buy these? I don't know!

Hmmm... after reading Warren Buffett's advice, I have a second thought! Thank you Sir, you knock my head hard! I still have few more hand phones at home, left unused, and my MacBook Pro I just bought it last year...It is perfect and more than what I NEED! So why iPad?

I have to admit, that is greed in action, hahaha... Now I think I should walk the talk... 向Warren Buffett 看齊吧! Ask myself, do I need that? Very weak sound from my heart says "no~~~~~~"... Haha, so let go that things, at least I can save RM 7,000 or more, wow, not bad!

Saving? With INSTANT reaction, do you know what I am thinking NOW? Haha, let you know my thought: "Why not make a trip to Europe by just adding few more thousands?" Ha... you see, another greed in action, so fast! This is how the mind working, it always wants something! Mind is also very good at justification. It tells me: "You are not wasting money lah, after all traveling is your hobby, right? Give yourself a rest mah!"; "Why keep the money in the bank account, while you are in the heaven. Better enjoy now, be happy while you are alive!"; "Aiya, you have friends in Europe what, go lah visit them, not much money spend mah..." Hahaha... very tempting 'advice', and more powerful than Warren Buffett's one!

Now, my friends ... You judge, what should I do? Or just forget about that and go to Facebook playing games day & night, to kill time? Oh no, my dear, that is NOT my hobby lah... only get my mind more deluded & ignorant... it becomes addicted too! Not a good idea...Not my WAY of life.

Anyway, life is not perfect, with all those weaknesses, and sometimes up & down, it is still wonderful, and full of happiness. So try to enjoy life by creating positive life style and LIVE with it, that is the MOST important thing to do. My goal is to live life in FULL every day. Just be mindful and watch my thoughts popping up, just look at the thought arising one after another, be it good or bad without resistance, sometimes just laugh at those greedy & funny thoughts, with the mind detachedly and remains calm & cool. Over a time, will see thoughts clearer and clearer... Eventually live life better, wiser & happier too. Because there is a detachment, a distance between thoughts and yourself. This cool distance make you less and less affected or involved with your thoughts.

Interesting? You also can try, then you will agree, and enjoy your life, and you don't depend on anyone for happiness but just train your mind in this way, you will see thought is NOT you, thought is thought only! You can take it as a 'hobby', to 'kill' your time rather than playing Facebook's game! Try it...Cool!

By this way I will live my life more in need, rather than want. Sure, first thing, I have to let go and CUT OFF all those unnecessary things, including people! Involved with people who are insincere with BIG ego, they always disturb mind's peacefulness. For peace and happiness, try to avoid these people.

Actually simple life is a happy life. Yes, it is true, but happiness, different from sensual pleasure, such as enjoying a good meal, a good sleep, or indulge in bodily sensations like love, intimate relationships, etc. The sensual pleasure depends on OTHER to provide you pleasure, and it is outside thing, it is also NOT dependable, as people tend to change, situation will change too, not stable.

But happiness, PEACE & CALM, it cannot be found from outside, it is HERE & NOW, within your heart and mind! But it needs to be realized by purification of heart and mind, by making yourself more sincere and honest not only to people but to YOURSELF! It means you see the negative sides of yourself, like greed, anger,selfishness,big ego, etc. That is the process of purification of your mind & heart by understanding your own nature. Gradually with deeper self understanding, happiness arises by itself. You no need to seek it, it comes when you are ready! You no need to BEG people for happiness, but for sensual pleasure, YES! It depends on your friends, your husband, your wife, your girlfriend, your money, your career, your boss, even your religion, etc. Depend on all these external things to stir up your pleasure, without these your are lost and empty. You think you are happy if you own them, have them, control them, and lack of these you are insecure. Not realized that these are all impermanent. They come and go, without your permission! Once you had, and lost them again, then you are depressed.

Then you feel empty and hollow in life, being unhappy, you want to grasp something to replace the hollowness and emptiness in life. You look high & low, for things you want, to satisfy your pleasure and wanting. You even hide yourself by indulging in internet gaming to avoid meaningless life, that created by you! In this manner, we FOREVER cannot be satisfied, just like chasing a rainbow, it is fruitless. Therefore we are always being unhappy and insecure. I think everyone might have experienced this before, right? There is no secure marriage or relationship in this world, they subject to time, and change. We just don't know when, the change will come! We live in the world of change.

Happiness also cannot co-exist with the mind full of GREED, DELUSION & IGNORANCE, right? Just like brightness & darkness. In other words, you cannot be happy when you hurt people, not sincere in action and not tell truth or honest when deal with friend. Then your friend will avoid you, he will go away and leave you alone because he has choice. Why waste time on you? How can you have happiness by being not sincere to other? Universal law is like this: it goes around, and comes around, and caused karmic consequences to you, eventually. This is due to deep inside your heart, what you did to other, good or bad, you know but you don't admit it. There is BIG ego inside thinks other always wrong, I am NO wrong, why should I admit? This shows the pride and arrogance. The ego and pride that create a distance between you and your friend.

So to have happiness, first thing is to admit we are not perfect and make mistakes. Start from here, we change the mental attitude, from unwholesome mental state to wholesome mental state, and cultivate good and kind thoughts, then automatically, you will be a sincere person because of sincere heart, by putting away your pride and ego, right?

Just to share .... The thoughts that arising at these moments, with the happiness also arises from my sharing with you. May all of you be well and happy. Cheer up!

Be Happy With What You Have...

'People complain they have no shoes, other living without legs.' I remember this was what the late Chief, Dr. K. Sri Dhammananda of Brickfield saying in one of his Friday's Dhamma Talks in Brickfield Temple. I still remember this meaningful statement though it was more than 10 years ago! It is always inspired and encouraged me when go through the vicissitudes of life. Truth never change with time. So our wisdom tells us... be happy with what you have...

I really touch and move by the power of the human spirit, which is shown at its mightiest by this one little girl. I salute her! Sharing with you, one of the inspiring forwards from a friend...

Qian Hong Yen lost her legs in an accident. Her family in China are poor and couldn't afford prosthetic legs, so she uses a basketball to help her move. - Qian uses two wooden props to drag herself, and never complain, even though she has worn out six basketballs. She attends her class and she always smiles.

Extraordinary - The smiling crippled girl...

My dear friends, how can you feel frustrated, upset and complain about your life, when you compared to this little smiling cripple girl...

Hey, try to look deeper, we will know that the world does not owe us anything, be grateful to life: being alive is the MOST wonderful thing in LIFE and...

Always cheerful -
So be grateful with what you have!
Contented & Smile Always...

普緹 ： 一位有正義感的法醫 - 2

Dr. Pornthip Rojanasunand (普緹)

1. 隨着閱歷的增長，對了解人生也加深。普緹說："我的工作，讓我不斷有機會接觸亡者。我常常反問自己：為什麼他們死得如此悲慘？他們到底發生了什麼事？” 從死者身上，晋緹了解到每個人的因緣業力都不一樣，也同時明白及時行善的道理。“除了父母，出家人，佛陀的教導，我的工作也是我的善知識。這份工作是最能使我真切感悟佛法的。

2. 從工作上，晋緹了解到 "有生必有死" 的道理；從佛法的教導中，她明白 "有死必有生" 的輪迴實像。如果我們了解輪迴是苦的道理，我們就要常常行善培福，同時去除自己內心的雜念。這樣，才能免於受輪迴之苦。與死亡的頻密接觸，讓普緹看透了輪迴之苦，因為世間太多苦難，而無論轉世到天道，或地獄，也免不了受苦。因此她笑稱："最好是不要輪迴了!"

3. 生命脆弱，無常可怕。生命何其脆弱，無常是多麼可怕。普緹從佛法的角度分析，她認為這是業力的因素。我們不知道下一秒將發生什麼事，好比海嘯的災民完全沒預料海嘯的發生一樣。倘若不把握及時行善，就後悔莫及了。

Quoted from Facebook (Dr. Pornthip Rojanasunand Fan Club)

The Way of Chuang Tzu

The Way of Chuang Tzu

The man in whom Tao

Acts without impediment

Does not bother with his own interests

And does not despise

Others who do

He does not struggle to make money

And does not make a virtue of poverty

He goes his way

Without relying on others

And he does not pride himself

On walking alone

While he does not follow the crowd

He won't complain of those who do

Rank and reward

Make no appeal to him

He is not always looking for right and wrong

Always deciding "Yes" or "No"

普緹 ： 一位有正義感的法醫 - 1

Dr. Pornthip Rojanasunand (普緹）－ 泰國法醫

最近到我國爲趙明福墜死案，做驗屍的泰國法醫普緹，她對工作的熱誠，專業，勇氣，讓很多人留下深刻印象， 對她非常敬佩。在我國，每天看報紙都是負面新聞。 政府的貪污，無能，腐敗，溺用權力，ISA，打壓人民。造成 那些有良知，有勇氣的人越來越少了。能看到一個善良，有正義感，又有智慧的女人，真的讓人耳目一新。哈，又多了一個 hero，好感動喔！以下是報紙對她點點滴滴的報導，希望能給那些有緣的知音人，一起來分享這份難得一見的真 善 美。也許能喚起人心善良的一面。

1. 普緹勇於對抗強權，追求真相的態度也令她在社會上樹立不少敵人。黑社會分子懸賞高價要取她的人頭。她笑笑說：“我從不感到畏懼，因為我只是找出真相。

2. 1999 年，突然發現自己患上了甲狀腺結腸癌。“當我發現自己患上甲狀腺結腸癌後，一開始覺得很難過，但佛理有言： 生死有命，沒有人可預測自己的未來。” 她說，患癌後她變得更會處理自己的情緒，不輕易生氣，討厭他人，或給自己壓力。因為她深信負面情緒會減低身體的免疫力，導致癌細胞擴散的更快。

3. “死亡”對妳的意義？死亡讓我更懂得如何管理自己的生命。不過，我從不害怕死亡。我享受法醫的生活。身為一名虔誠的佛教徒，我相信因果循環和轉世，但下輩子我不想再轉世為人。死亡也讓我懂得把握機會做好事，天地所有眾生皆按循因果法則來規定，自己所做所為的一切好壞善惡，未來就會形成福禍的報償。

4. 普緹“神祕觸覺”，搜證破案。“你可以說那是第六感吧”。普緹這一次在趙明福命案也觀察到別的法醫所忽略的其他傷勢。

5. 妳一生中獲益最多的事情？一些泰國人認為，壞事纏身是因為自己做了壞事，但我不這麼認為。身為佛教徒，學習如何面對，接受問題，是一個重要的人生道理。若我們可以面對挑戰，就可以學習如何解決問題。這是我一生中獲益最多的。

6. 因為誠懇，所以親切。 普緹風塵僕僕來到我國， 還要接受各別媒體獨家專訪， 她還是樂意答應，不忍心拒人於千里之外。結果，她馬不停蹄地接受多家媒體輪流訪問，而鎂光燈閃個不停，她也沒有怨言，直到她的保驃忍不過說，普緹身體不大好，操勞了一整天，希望攝影師不要一直用閃光燈。普緹笑一笑，繼續訪問。

7. 普緹談到專業時，總是能夠很敬業樂業地說，她沒有悲傷，沒有情緒，因為她的工作必須專業地完成。這就是，簡單，快樂，或像她自己說的，nothing to hide，沒甚麼好隱瞞，因此大家都喜歡接近她。

8. 如果想知道更多普緹的資訊，可以到她的Facebook (Dr. Pornthip Rojanasunand Fan Club)。

總結來說，普緹給我們帶來啟示，給人一個正直，善良，誠懇的印象，是學習的好模範。

自己是自己最大的敵人

有時候人很無奈， 萬事不斷在變，卻無法及時掌握， 錯失過了才來後悔。無奈的是，變是生命的一部份，也是自然法則，除了接受，還是要接受！不然的話就準備受苦吧。

尤其人的心態無時不在改變，包括事業，命運，健康，人心，親惰，愛情都一樣。缘起缘灭，生命无常，一切不能控制。 緣來的時候無法擋，緣去的時候也很無奈，又何苦拼命要停在某個生命點呢？過去旳都已經過去了，每個生命點，不論快樂，悲傷，都是生命的一小段，是生命的小插曲，也是人生的一個過程。時間總會過去的，不管喜歡與否，曰子還是一天一天的過啊。在命中，應該屬於我們的，我們自然得到，得不到的也就是命中沒有帶來，就順從緣份吧，何必強求？不是常說放下嗎？

我想，只有懂得真正原諒別人，反省自己的過失，同時也會原諒自己時，這樣才算是放下吧。也只有刻苦銘心去體會過，痛苦過，才能看透，知道甚麼叫做放下，甚麼叫做箅了，甚麼叫做無所謂－的真正含義呀！ 要不然，那不過是口頭說說罷了。

其實，大部份的痛苦都是自己造成的，自己才是自己最大的敵人。唉，人還真是會自找苦吃，怪不得別人。隨緣，認命，好像是含有宿命的意義。但是經過人生的歷練，深一層認清生命，我還是認為，缘起缘灭，是生命的本質。 要快樂，就要懂得該認命的時候就認命吧！該放下的時候就放下吧！是給自己一條生路，也給別人一個機會，何樂不為！何況得到或失去，是人生必經之路，而且是考驗我們的時候。不論得到或失去，也要學會感激生命，也感激老天，所給我們所得到的一切。尤其在失去時受到的傷害，也只有此刻才能讓我們有機會認清生命。因為在失去時所承受的痛苦，它強迫我們去學習，去面對，去體會，去反省。因此更深入了解自己和生命的意義。

事情過後反而會感激那段失落，痛苦的日子，給我們帯來了更正面，更清晰，更成熟的人生經驗。也許這段過程是生命給我們上的一課，要我們從中學習。經歷了這些經驗，幫助我們成長，增加我們的智慧。也學會了感激，原諒那些曾經傷害過我們的人。自然的， 心就會打開，自動放下。執著於對與錯，愛與恨，沒完沒了的掙扎，也從心中慢慢消失，換來的是平靜，踏實，快樂的心境。似乎領悟到，只有付出無條件的愛，原諒，感激，真誠的關心， 即能給別人帶來快樂，又能淨化白己的心態， 這真是我人生最大的收穫。

“放下”，“認命”，“無所謂”，“算了吧” － 簡單的一句話，卻能從中了解人生，増進智慧，打開了正面的心態和意念來面對人生。將會受益無窮，真好用呢！